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Every USA election cycle, there is a predictable chorus of celebrities vowing to pack up and relocate to Canada. If their candidate loses, they’ll board the first flight, ticket in hand, maple leaves in their eyes. It’s an old refrain, and by now, the polite Canadian in me wishes to say, “Thanks, but no thanks.” There’s no reason to uproot your Hollywood lives. We’re very happy here! And to be honest, Canada is closed. We’ve already let enough ‘bad actors’ into our country the past few years.
Let me paint a picture. Canada is a lovely, peaceful country where the politest conflict could be a Tim Hortons customer asking for two sugars instead of one. We enjoy our space, forests, and cozy orderliness. To be honest, we’re not prepared for a ‘slew’ of disappointed Hollywood celebrities, complete with entourages, agents, and stylists to descend on our cities. Because, believe me, if they do arrive, they will want their green juice bars, paparazzi-friendly sidewalks, and most likely some airbrushed poutine.
That is not how things work in Canada. We may be a country with open arms, but let’s face it: there are limits. A person can only take so many “Are you a movie star?” conversations before they run out of polite ways to avoid them.
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